I Gotta Hurry

     I have got to hurry.  I found my hidden laptop that I brought with me.  The Sillarians don't know a thing about it.  The last time I tried to post without permission I got zapped.  That hurt.
     It wasn't bad actually after getting over the initial shock.  It put me into a sleep-like state in which I was aware of my surroundings and what was going on but was not part of it.  I wondered what was happening, especially when an asian looking gentleman came in that looked a lot like my cardiologist said that I had a 30% blockage in one artery and a 20% blockage in two other arteries.  Were they doing another angiogram or was I just dreaming?  I don't know.  Got to run, I hear footsteps.  Actually, I really don't know if Torvac has feet.  They look like feet, but that could just be a ruse. 

Greetings From Sillar...Yah, Right

     I am going to come clean.  You as my readers deserve it.  There is no planet Sillar and there is no Torvac. I have been sitting in my apartment writing this drivel and all this stuff that I have been posting is nothing but CRAP!  My creative juices just haven't been there so I decided to go in a way that I am not proud of.  I am so sorry that I have been deceiving you and if I have created any problems for you.  In this blog, I want to keep the highest standard of integrity....

     "Dave...Dave...uh, what are you doing?"
     "What?  I am doing nothing.  What are you talking about, Torvac?"
     "I can see that you are writing on your laptop.  Now you know that you are not stable enough to do that today."
     "I'm not doing anything.  I am not writing on the computer, Torvac. You know I wouldn't lie to you."
     " OK, Dave let me have the computer."
     "What computer I don't have my laptop and I am not writing anything!"
     "Dave, come on I don't want to get firm."
     "No!  You can't have it."
     "Dave, you know that I don't want to take action."
     "NO, NO!!! You can't have it, its mine and you can't have it.  I have a right to it and you can't have it. NO! NO! You can't have it!  It's mi.....ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ"
     This is Torvac, and I want to tell you that I didn't want to do that.  Unfortunately, Dave has had a relapse and has been heavily sedated. He hasn't been hurt and is now resting comfortably.  The Sillarian High Council and the Medical Ministry will reevaluate the situation and will report to you on Dave's condition.  We have his best interests in mind, and want to assure you of his progress after his proceedure.  Sometimes these things happen and we are sure that Dave will be back soon.  

Its Not A Conspiracy, Its Education

     I bid you a good day from Sillar.  The Sillarians have assured me that I will have an escort today and explore Sillar today.  The Sillarians are humanoid and communicate to me directly through voice communication, though they prefer telepathy.  Sometimes they forget that we mere earthlings don't communicate that way and look at me in a very curious way.  They are very advanced, but cannot get a pizza right.  I am not criticizing, just letting you know what it is like here on Sillar.  They make a mean hot dog though.
     With the help of advanced communication techniques utilized by the Sillarians, I was able to view some of the Christmas festivities that went on with my family.  It was a joy to see the grandkind open their packages and this was my yougest grandchild's first Christmas.  I was sorry though that I couldn't look in on my daughter, son-in-law, and their two sons of which Rusty is the youngest grandchild.  They live in another part of the United States and the Sillarians were having trouble with the uplink. I miss them very much.
     The Sillarians are very much interested in the mental developement of we humans.  They don't want to directly interfere with our progress and have sort of a "Prime Directive" similar to that which was in Star Trek.  They do what they can, and do it very quietly.
     How many of you remember the movie series Transformers.  This series was produced by Sillarian operatives and has spawned a line of toys that "transform" from robots to cars and back again.  These "toys" come directly from the Sillarians to stimulate human brain developement.  The Sillarians endeavored to get these "toys" into the hands of human children, but it is the male grownups of the families who actually work with these "toys",  many very unsuccessfully even when the Sillarians provide the directions in pictures.  To those fellow humans who are participating in the Sillarian educational project, I salute you.  Good luck! 


        

Important Announcement!

     I have explained to the Sillarians the holiday of Christmas.  They are very accomodating and are allowing me to celebrate it in my own way.  I only wish that I were with all of you.  With that in mind, Torvac and I want to wish all of you the very Merriest of Christmasses.  I may of spelled that wrong, but my spellcheck doesn't work well out here.   

Merry Christmas to All!!!!

Feeling Great!

     I thought that I would give you an update on my health and what is happening with my recuperation.  I am feeling great and have asked the Sillarians when I am going home.  They have informed me that the damage done due to the lunar eclipse was greater than they had thought and they had to use more Formula 409. They had to send Torvac back to Earth to a Wal-mart in Dearbourn, Michigan to get another 100 gallons.  He was tempted to bring back Janitor in a Drum, but the chemical makeup of Janitor in a Drum breaks down in interplanetary flight at light-speed and beyond so he stuck with the 409. 
     The proceedure caused some minor headaches and the Sillarians were a bit concerned about that.  They watched the situation quite closely, giving me massive doses of Dutch Apple Pie and Vanilla Ice Cream. That seemed to do the trick and the headaches went away.  There is a problem with this in that I gained 150 Earth pounds.  The Sillarians said that I would be too heavy for inteplanitary travel, so they have put me on a strict regimin of diet and excercise to loose the weight.  I don't mind the weight lifting, but I do hate cardio. 
     Just a word about the food up here.  It is pretty good, and the Sillarians try to make "Earth" food.  It is just not the same though.  It is very close, but not home.  They haven't got pizza down quite right. 
     I must go now, I am quickly getting tired and the Sillarians don't want me to tax my brain.  That comes later.  They told me that advanced interplanetary quantum physics class comes later.  More on this when it happens.  I don't know what their thinking is on this, I tried to tell them that I flunked junior high algerbra...twice.     

I am Healing Nicely

I want to thank all of you for your conern as to how I am doing here on Planet Sillar.  My prognosis is fantastic and I am heading for a full recovery.  The headaches are subsiding, but the Sillarians wanted me to share with you just how difficult it is taking a human brain out of its cranium and washing it.  They used to have a specific industrial solvent that they used to do this, but found out that Formula 409 worked just as well and did not hurt the fragile Sillarian environment. I see Torvac coming which means it is time for my therapy session, so I must go. Be withyou soon again.

Critical Update on David's Condition

Torvac here with an update on David's condition.  The proceedure went better than expected and he should be returning to Earth shortly.  He is up talkng and eager to share his thoughts and observations with you as far as this journey.  He misses you and can't wait to get back to you.  We will have future updates on his condition as things develope.  David and I wish to express our gratitute for your concern and loyalty during this difficult time.  I can entertain questions, just write your comments and we will surely address them.   

Important Update

     This is Torvac again, and I just wanted to update you on David's condition.  He is feeling fine and just suffering the effects of the recent Lunar Eclipse that just occurred on your planet.  Things like this normally don't effect your species but David was in a particularly vulnerable position, the details of which I cannot elaborate on.  The Sillarian High Council has determined that he shall immediately be transported to Sillar and given treatment.  The treatment will in no way alter his personality, as our preliminary evaluations and observations have concluded.  Given his condition and treatment, he should return to Earth after a short itme of recouperation and healing.  I want to assure all of you loyal readers that he is in good hands and is being treated very well. We will continue to update you on his condition and progress. 

Sorry for the Inconvenience

     I am Torvac from the planet Sillar. I am the innerplanetary robot overseer of the writer of this blog, David.  We have monitored the writings in this blog, and the high council of Sillar has issues with what is happening in David's brain and are dealing with the situation.  This crainial conditon is manifested and expressed in his blog posts.  Yesterday's post was a deciding guidepost as to what actions the High Council will take.  We have decided to evaluate possible treatments so that David can return to a healthier state.  His writings have been suspended until further notice so that the High Council can make an appropriate decision as to solutions and what is best for David.  Please be patient as we all want what is best for David, and we want to assure you that he will return as soon as circumstances permit.  Thank you for your concern and your loyal readership. David will return to this blog soon.



No...No...I don't want to go.  I'm OK.  You don't have to take me there.  Let me work on it, I'll get better.  I promise. Please Torvac, I'm  OK...    

My Deepest Thoughts

    I am going to do something that I very rarely do on my blog.  I am going to share with you my deepest inner thoughts.  Whatever is there and however deep and profound, I am going to share it with you.  Give me a minute so that I can gather my thoughts in order to put them into word.  I truly want you to understand what is going on in my mind and find the words to share those thoughts.  Give me a minute...





     Hold on...I'm thinking.






     I'm still thinking.








     This is hard, I'm going to try to go a little deeper.











It's been a while and still nothing.








     Wow, I am so used up and tired.  That was very difficult.  Here comes what I found in the deepest recesses of my small mind.  Its empty.  My coffee is there in front of me but I haven't finished it.  I know that the coffee thing is getting old.  I promise that in the next blog I won't mention that I haven't had my coffee...or not.
     

What's Brewing?

     I saw on my chart of where peope who are reading my blog are living, and I see I have Brazilians.  I just want to say thank you!  Keep those wonderful little brown beans coming. You give the world oranges too, but we have enough of those here in California. I also see that I have readers in Columbia and want to thank them as well. Can I send some feed to Juan Valdez for his donkey?  If that sounded a bit patronizing, I truly apologize, it is only 5:30 (05:30 in international time.  See, I really do know how to tell international time.) here in California and, you guessed it...I haven't had my coffee. 

Neither Here Nor There

     Yes, I am here.  Someone asked me last night if I was there.  How can I be here and there at the same time?  Isn't that impossible?  Since I am here and not there, how can I be there when I am here?  I have been accused of being not all there, and that is very true because I cannot be there and here at the same time. 
     This brings up another question.  Can I get there from here?  I think the answer to that is a solid no, because if I get there I am no longer there I am here.  I can arrive, but my there is no longer there it is here.
     I am on my way to Starbuck's to meet with a friend.  I will be there soon.  If you call me on the phone and ask me if I am at Starbuck's, I will answer yes.  If you ask me if I am there I will answer no, I am here at Starbuck's.  How can I be there at Starbuck's when I am here at Starbuck's?
     This is leading me to another point.  I haven't had my coffee yet.  Your assignment for today as I am trying to get your participation in all of this is to ponder the logic in all of this.  You can come to only one logical conclusion, and that is:  What the heck is he talking about? I don't think he knows. Quite frankly, I don't know and if you came to that conclusion bravo too you.  Go to the head of the class. Keep your wits about you, because tomorrow comes the "you and I" discussion.   Remember, I haven't had my coffee yet.

Sorry...I Was Gone

     I really don't have to apologize, but I will.  Having not posted the last couple of days, I know that I have totally disappointed you.  You trust me and have come to rely on my comments to cheer you up and make your day.  I know that you live for my observations and when I don't give them to you, your day is not complete.  The realization of just how important I am to you has overcome me with a great sense of responsibility and I feel that I have maybe let you down...maybe not.  Sometimes, I overestimate my importance.  OK, what importance?
     Here is the totally undiluted truth.  I was working.  In my hotel...or my small, cheap motel room...the internet didn't work.  I couldn't post.  Are you going to hold that against me?  What more do you want.  Didn't I post Monday morning before I left?  Actually, I am asking you because I truly don't remember if I did or not.  I didn't post yesterday morning because I went to sleep very late and didn't get up in time and circumstances took me out of my normal routine.  Once my routine is broken, its all over...attention deficit you know. 
     The bottom line is this.  I am who I am and I can only do what I can only do.  I am not superhuman, but will promise you that I will do my best given the demands that you place on me.  I truly understand the high demands you place on me.  If I disppointed you, I am truly sorry. Now, let me take my toungue out of my cheek.  

Its Cold Out There

     How cold is it?  There are frost warnings all over the Central California.  It is very cold.  I think that the mercury has dipped to under 36 degrees fahrenheit.  Those of you in the rest of the world, I would convert that to celsius, but right now I haven't had my cofee and you know what that means.  You are on your own with that one. 
    

Tough Decisions Have To Be Made

     In this world that we live in, we have to make some very tough decisions.  That was the case with me today.  The decisions that I had to make today weigh heavy on how the world will function and I am very much aware that if the decisions I make this morning are incorrect, the world will change.  In many cases, the world will just not be the same.  It is in my hands as to whether or not the world is a better place, or spins out of control toward the dark side...do I have to reference that?  Its from Star Wars and John Lucas probably first came up with the idea of the "Dark Side", so there.  Don't sue me John.
     These are the questions that I am wrestling with, and the world is holding its breath as to the answers.  Here they come, are you ready?  You can breathe, I don't want to be the cause of your untimely death so please take a breath.  Make sure you are sitting down though.  I don't want you to faint, fall over and hit yourself on the head and hurt yourself.  If the suspense is killing you, don't let it.  You will be all right. 
     Are you ready for the questions?  Here goes, by the way...How did you sleep last night.  That wasn't fair, was it?  Now I give you the questions, you have been so patient.  Should I make cofee?  Should I clean up the kitchen because it is dirty.   Finally, should I eat that piece of chocolate cake?    Think of it friends, what would happen if I don't make the right decisions.  The world as we know it would end.
     The cofee is made and I am enjoying it.  The kitchen is clean, except for a few pots and pans and I am going to leave the chocolate cake for later, probably for lunch.  You can breathe easy now, the decisions are made.  I don't know the consequences of those decisions, we will just have to wait as the day progresses.
     Wait a minute, circumstances are demanding I make more important decisions.  World, I beg you please don't end because of what actions I must now take.  Should I take a shower, and what should I wear today. 
It is so very hard being in a position of such leadership and power.

No News Is Good News

     Today I bring you good news.  There is no news, in fact I wasn't going to post today.  I felt that you, my loyal reader would be extremely disappointed in me if I didn't post, so here I am writing.  Since I have no news to share with you, that is good news.
     Think about that for a minute.  I will give you a bit.  In fact, I will give you longer than that.  I am out the door to make my tee time and I am late so take as much time as you need and get back to me.  I realize that it will take longer than others to contemplate what I have just written, but I am in fact OK with that.  Remember, this blog is interactive and is very much sensitive to the needs of you, my reader.
     By now, you have probably figured out today's post.  I will fess up to the fact that I had nothing to write about.  My mind woke up totally blank and not in a state of brilliance.  I know that some of you will say what is so different about that situation, but it's true.  This blog is sort of like when many of us were in college, faced with an essay exam in which your life depended on your getting a good grade.  You did not pay attention in class and have learned absolutely nothing in the class but are faced with the daunting task of passing this particular essay test.  So, you go for it.  You write and write in hopes that the the professor will be totally baffled or that he or she tires of the crap and finds something of brilliance.  Admit it, we have all been there.
     So, with this wonderful observation on life today I have got to get the heck out of here.  I am going to miss my tee time. 

Round and Round She Goes...Where She Stops, I Don't Give A Rip!!!

     I am trying to loose weight, as I have said in past posts.  My goal is to loose another 50 pounds and to get off as many of the twenty blood-pressure medications as I can.  My proceedure for doing this is simple.  First, I am cutting out all...well almost all as this is the Christmas Season...sugar.  Next, I am going to eat three meals and a couple of healthy snacks between those meals to cut cravings for sugar.  Add to this, I am going to make my portions smaller and eat what I want as i don't do well on diets.  Finally, its back to the gym and I am lifting weights again at least three times a week and doing cardio for at least five days a week.  It seems to be working as I have lost six pounds, water weight to be sure, since I started on Monday.  I really feel good though.
     Today was my cardio day, twenty five minutes of biking and five minutes of cooldown on a recumbrant bike.  Everytime I get on the bike I am reminded of the scene from the movie "The Right Stuff", which dealt with the early years of the American space program and the training of the Mercury 7 astronauts, and the scene of the chimpanee Ham riding on the stationary bike.  When I am riding on the bike, that is kind of how I feel.  I feel like a chimpanzee riding a bike and going nowhere fast, at level 1 actually.  The pedals go around, but I get nowhere.  Is there something wrong in this?  Is there something wrong with me...well, that's another story but we won't deal with that here.

     Disclaimer:  I am afraid that I wasn't exactly truthful with you.  I am only on six blood pressure medications.  Sorry if I caused you any inconvenience but I want to maintain the credibility and accuracy of my writing.  Please forgive me if I caused any discomfort.
---The author